The Insecure Leader Part One: I Messed Up


I Messed Up

I messed up recently. I miscommunicated with some people I lead.

Communication is so important when you lead others, and I dropped the ball with some important information.

Have you ever done that? Chances are you have, if you have led people for any duration of time. There comes a point when a leader can respond in a few different ways, when he/she messes up. In this post we will take a look at two ways a leader can respond.

Pass The Blame

The insecure leader passes the blame. It is easy to pass the blame. Blame someone, anyone, anything for the ball that was dropped. It was that person’s fault for not making sure we were communicating the right info. They didn’t do what needed to be done. If they would have just gone the extra mile, then this wouldn’t have happened. They will get there soon, we just need to be patient with them. I am the expert, if they would have just listened to me. They weren’t listening, it’s not my fault. Now the insecure leader can even blame technology. The email or text message was never sent.

“It wasn’t me,” the insecure leader said. “It was them.”

Appear Perfect

The insecure leader feels the need to keep up the appearance of perfection. They put up a false facade of perfection. They really aren’t perfect because no one really is perfect. This leader cannot be real or show vulnerability. They are afraid to lose control or appear like they don’t know what they are doing.

They cannot say, “I messed up.” “I dropped the ball.”

So they pass the blame and attempt to keep up the appearance of perfection.


I didn’t pass the blame with this situation I mentioned. And anyone who has worked with me or anyone who I’ve led knows that I don’t put up a facade of perfection. I am not even close to perfection.

Why put up a facade that everyone can see right through?

This hasn’t always been the case for me. I used to be more apt to pass the blame or attempt to put up a facade of perfection. Leaders can do something about their insecurity. It doesn’t have to drive their decisions.

Be on the look out for “The Insecure Leader Part Two: There Is a Way out of the Maze”, when I talk about some practices that can help a leader deal with their insecurity. This is an ongoing battle, but you can do it!